Deflected Narcissism

Reading about your professors on the web is a kind of deflected narcissism. Dr. Jones and Patty Kirk gain acclaim for their published works, and I gain some strange kind of pride by association. The process couldn't be simpler. Simply type their names in a google or blogger search bar and browse the displayed sites, each with its own imperfect voice, thoughts, and praises. Or hop over to Amazon and search directly for the books themselves and read the meandering, anecdotal reviews stating what they liked, what they didn't, and above all how they felt about it. "It felt a bit preachy," is followed immediately by the next reviewer saying, "I love how the book never felt preachy." And as narcissism would have it, you condemn those who detract and commend those with the good sense to praise.

I didn't always have professors with small fame, but these four years have been good to JBU. Quality teachers have arrived, worked hard, and succeeded in publishing books and students. Older, more experienced professors have finally released their products of toil both in hardbacks and diplomas. The books have been fairly well received, each with its odd negative review, yes. But mostly positive.

It's strange to compare myself to these author's works. Of course, Confessions of an Amateur Believer or Is Belief in God Good, Bad, or Irrelevant: A Professor and a Punk Rocker Discuss more reflect their authors than me. But in some ways, the books and I are both products of their efforts writing and teaching. The book reviews are deflected reviews of myself.

I'm protected by two things. First, the reviews are overwhelmingly positive. Second, I ignore all negative reviews as a proper narcissist would. I am beyond my education. Maybe.